I just had a nighttime masturbation session, and it went so well. I started with my usual routine of grinding on a towel on the floor, then lay on my back and inserted a finger into my vagina to work things up and get things wetter. I wanted to use my new vibrator since I want to get morefortable with it and figure out what my body likes. The last time I used it, maybe a week ago, I’d been pretty tight, and it hurt. I don’t think I gave myself enough time to really warm up and loosen.
Tonight it was different. I lubed up the vibe with my natural fluids and slowly pushed in. It hurt at the entrance, as it always has, but once the bulbous head got through, it slid right in. Interestingly, though I was tight and there was still some pain, it was actually enjoyable. As I moved the vibe around, in and out (not all the way out; just until the head hit that tight entrance) and in circles, the sensation was great. I could feel how wet I was,bined with the feeling of needing to urinate. That just… felt erotic.
I was also listening to some “hot talk” audio and imagining it was my future husband making love to me—very arousing and pleasurable. I hit a nice hot place and kept drilling the vibe against it, and I orgasmed. My orgasms are quick and short and not earth-shattering, but I always feel relaxed afterward, so that’s good enough. Maybe with time, I will experience better and longer orgasms.
Tonight’s self-care time was encouraging because I climaxed using something other than my go-to grinding-on-towel, so I have a lot of hope that my body is weing new experiences and learning to enjoy penetration. God is good to give us this gift of masturbation. I quietly thanked Him when I was through before climbing back into bed.